~ from the diary of winslow, last name unknown ~
My dad tells me to stay away from the windows. He says the world has gone to hell, that I don’t understand. I think he underestimates me.
When I was ten the neighbours were raided by the military police. They were dragged to the street, made to kneel on the sidewalk and shot one by one until only Maggie was left. The squad leader (I think he’s the one my dad calls “the colonel”) whispered something in her ear and let her live. It’s been three years and she hasn’t spoken a word since. After that we started taking the curfew a lot more seriously.
Anyway – he’s afraid because I’m no longer a little girl. I get it. But life in London isn’t so bad (for the most part). There are other places much worse off than us.
Gotta go, dad just told me to switch off the light.
Today I went with dad to renew my homeschooling permit. I hate going to the City. After suffering through the crowds in the tube you finally get there and all you see are the police uniforms and the barking dogs. I prefer the quietness of our neighbourhood. It went ok though, my dad knows people there. From the looks we got homeschooling is pretty rare.
Dad is moody lately, he works too hard. Mom’s birthday is coming up, which doesn’t help. AND we had trouble sleeping yesterday because of all the helicopters. Who knows where they were going. Maggie also came to her window, we waved at each other from across the street.
Today we went to visit Grandma at the retirement home. She looks even tinier than last time but that’s normal, she turns 94 this year! Dad says she’s healthy because she lived most of her life in the countryside.
She was sitting by the window as usual and didn’t talk much. She always smiles at me but I’m not sure she knows who I am. I like her eyes, they’re big and blue. I wish I had them, mine are sort of grey, like dad’s.
I don’t like the home, it looks too much like a hospital. But the workers there seem nice and dad spent some time speaking to one of the nurses. She told him that his sister came to visit last week with my cousins. They don’t talk much, I only met her a couple of times. She smokes like a chimney.
Later Dad asked me what I want for my birthday and I said I want mom back. I don’t know why, it just came out. He stared at me for a bit, gave me a hug and then went upstairs. When I went to bed the door to his room was closed. I felt horrible.
I can be so stupid sometimes.